I was invited for the weekend to a ball at Chumleigh Hall,
To celebrate the wedding of Sue Vere and cousin Paul,
I read the guest list over, and imagine my delight,
When I found sweet Fanny Adams
Had come to spend the night

Chorus :
Oh the keyhole in the door, my boys, the keyhole in the door,
I took up my position by the keyhole in the door.

I left the ballroom early, just after half-past nine,
And as I hoped to find it, her room lay next to mine,
So like that man Columbus, I set off to explore,
And took up my position by the keyhole in the door.
Chorus

She first removed her stockings, her silken legs to show,
And then her frilly panties to reveal her fur below,
"Now take off all the other things," was all I could implore,
And silently I gripped the knob,
And crossed the threshold door.
Chorus

Silently I shut the door, and took her in my arms,
And sooner than I'd expected, discovered all her charms,
And in case another person, should see the sights I saw,
I hung my pair of trousers o'er the keyhole in the door.
Chorus

That night I rode in glory, as I plumbed the girl's insides,
And on her heaving belly, had many a splendid rides,
But when I woke next morning, my cock was red and sore,
And it felt that I'd been screwing through
The keyhole in the door.
Chorus